Illnesses and deaths of high school friends...makes you think

   Message From: echristian@webtv.net (Elizabeth Christian) Date: Sun, Aug 6, 2000, 11:51am

To: echristian@webtv.net Subject: (no subject) Another view of retirement.

What if I instead of looking for challenges take the position that I am finally "home free"....I have managed to accumulate enough money not to have to work, am of an age that I no longer have major family responsibilites...at least of the kind I used to have....and that I am going to think of ways to try to enjoy each and every moment of life...

Who am I trying to "achieve" for...whose approval do I need ? So long as I am not working...NOBODY'S... You need approval when you are looking to get a good salary, get a better job....get somebody to love you....so that you have hugs, kisses, all that good physical stuff..and for what ???

Ah, no longer necessary, is it, Elizabeth ? Feeling good ..that starts with making your body feel good...

Exercise Food Sleep Enough water

those things...and other things that may be making your body to fail..as of course is does with age... Look back...that room in St. Ann's...

Tucky, long dead of cancer Greg..this terrible cancer Andree...a stroke downstairs

Marty Wasson..probably dead long ago .... Al Schneider.....clearly 10 years ago drinking far too much... Are you the only one who has lucked out..or at least lucked out ..so far ?


REACHING FOR HUMILITY

   Message From: echristian@webtv.net (Elizabeth Christian) Date: Mon, Aug 7, 2000, 8:59am To: echristian@webtv.net Subject:

A Frank Letter to Myself..you were never a strong achiever

It is now nine o'clock...Monday, August 6...and I am going to write a letter to myself acknowledging for the first time, perhaps, that I am not really an especially talented, able, focused, person...just a kind of "get by" person who happened to land somewhere that got me many of the good things in life...in fact a LOT of the good things in life....without my really having to work for them...I just "lucked" out....

Biography....

I was born white, to college graduates, who while not wealthy had the advantages of rank in the miltary and then a professional title that gave them enough money to live nicely...and be "respectable". I was educated..but never achieved..in any class, so far as I can remember. I took music lession, but was never very good...I kind of just got by..and then married and had a handicapped child..and took a library degree and spent a lot of time drawing a pay check, but frankly, not having much of an influence on anybody.

When I was at Mercer to begin with, there was little need for the library when the classes did not require patient contact.....and later...just by getting the Iowa system going...Medline going..things anyone could have done...things were pretty well handled. Now the web does it all..

In 1979 Pollock and his fellow faculty members brought you up short..the inadequcies of the library....you had been letting things slide for quite awhile as you entertained yourself with things like the 6 weeks in Ohio...trips to AACP meetings...that acomplished nothing..

Your efforts on a dissertation, twice..and all of those files you have tucked away somewhere...useless, useless, useless....

You do not write well..make big mistakes all the time and Judith and Missy brought you up short on this count....

You manged for several years...94,94,96, part of 97 to "play" on the weekends at the reference desk...long Sunday afternoons reading the New York Times....and hardly really doing what could be called work...yet drawing a salary...

Now....quitting to play would not be far afield from what you have been doing all along....at Mercer. Yet all the time you were so concerned about your "status" about not wanting to be called a "reference" librarian when that was about the size of it..what you were....

How much more guilt can I feel and have it be productive...what I need to do now is to move ahead. I am thinking about writing an essay on "simplifying life"...really simplifying life....

Yet here I am about to mail all these checks to bring this junk into my house....

What can I do next. I certainly cannot get the money back to apply to those credit card bills and taxes....

Well, enough for the moment.... You started accmumulating this stuff back about 1984, when the twins were born..and need to start getting rid of it...and not looking back.

Think about what Trudy said....you have something a little while, enjoy it...then pass it on...Maybe the idea of a doll library is not such a bad idea after all.... Ummm....

How do I escape this one ??


GETTING RID OF STUFF

IT OCCURS TO ME THAT MAYBE THE BEST WAY TO APPROACH RETIREMENT IS TO GET RID OF STUFF...HERE AT THE POINT THAT ALL OF A SUDDEN I HAVE STARTED NOT TO GET RID OF BUT TO ACQUIRE ALL THIS STUFF...BIG TIME....

GETTING RID OF MY NEW ZEALAND COLLECTION

   Message From: echristian@webtv.net (Elizabeth Christian) Date: Mon, Aug 7, 2000, 9:17am To: rhs4@le.ac.uk Cc: echristian@webtv.net Subject: Donation to the Library

I arrived at your name through a search on urban history libraries...and then just went through the faculty and picked you a t random...for help....

I did a job swap in Hamilton New Zealand last year...Hamilton, the fifth largest city in NZ...and found myself assemblying something of a little library on the history of Hamilton...the city itself.., history of 2 teriary education institutions there, the hospital, library, A and M show..biggest agricultureal show in the world....some artists drawings books of flora...

And..having brougnt them all back to the US..what to do with them. They don't need them in Hamilton...the libraries already have them.

Hamilton is a facinating city, largely, I think because it has an inferiority complex, is thought of as a "cow town, mudboots, Number..is it 5,6,7 wire..and all that"..and yet it is very cosmolitan really....Also there is the Maori connection..

So...if you think your library might be iterested...it is about 10 books...let me know. If not, point me in the direction of someone studying NZ urban history ...there...They do not need them in NZ..

Elizabeth